It's a very slow process - two steps forward, one step back - but I'm inching in the right direction. - Rob Reiner

August 17, 2011

A Tale of Two Conversations

Yesterday, my wonderful husband (Jim of 50after40) recounted a conversation we had in our bathroom while getting ready for work.  Perhaps you read it, if not I have included it below.

Jim's Version:

The scenario: I've been up since 2:15am because I couldn't sleep ... but I'm in a REALLY great mood ... I just had a killer speed workout where I touched 5:30/mile pace for half mile stretches (my fastest ever) ... I come into the bathroom where my beautiful wife is getting ready ... and ACTION:Me:  Hey beautiful ... wow, you look hotter than ever - is this heaven, 'cause there's an angel in my bathroom!
Michael: (Silent ... no response and snarling a little)
Me: Awe sugar-baby ... what the heck is wrong ... is everything okay?
Michael: (Silent ... no response and rolling her eyes)
Me: Wow, I had a great workout ... miles 5-8 were 6:36, 6:20, 6:24, 6:27 ... and best of all sweet-cheeks, I ran long portions of my run at a 5:30/mile pace!!!
Michael: Wow ... that's amazing babe! (mixed with a little sarcasm)
Me: I'm just sayin', that's really fast for me!
Michael:  Yeah, we get it ... you're awesome! (Now the sarcasm is obvious)
Me: I think if you go touch the sidewalk were I ran ... it's probably still warm!
Michael: (Deep sigh ... gripping the curling iron a little harder now ... shaking her head)
Me: Did you work out this morning?
Michael:  No I didn't!!! Is that okay with you??? It was planned because I have a swim tonight alright??? (detecting a little tension)
Me: Is it intimidating to live with a great athlete?
Michael: You're an idiot ... when are you going out of town this week???

Clearly my improving running prowess is not appreciated in the A.M. in my house.  That's okay, I know when she says things like,
"You're an 'idiot'" & "when are you going out of town this week?"  she really means, "Wow babe, you are one of the greatest athletes I've ever laid eyes on ... and I really aspire to be like you!  Please teach me the ways of running and how to master speed like you have!  I love you!"

Now, we all know there are two sides to every story (or conversation):  The right one (that would be mine) and the wrong one (that would be Jim).  Here is my corrected version of this conversation. You will notice alot less compliments.

Scenario:  I just got finished with my morning run, I’m just out of the shower and I’m getting ready for work.  Jim knows I like a little quiet time in the morning, but he never seems to want to give it to me.  I’m deep in thought, mentally preparing for the day……enter Jim practically floating on air, overly excited and already annoying me.

Jim coming into the bathroom

Jim:  Hey babe!  I just had the greatest run of all time!!  I’m amazing!!  I’m the man!!  I should run on the US Olympic team.  (I think at this point Jim did a cartwheel or something).
            Me:  That’s great babe.
Jim:  What’s wrong with you?  Are you mad about something? (Jim clearly can’t understand why I’m not bouncing off the walls excited about his personal greatness).
            Me:  Nothing is wrong.  I’m just tired. 
Jim:  What’s wrong, are you intimated by my greatness?  You don’t understand I just ran miles 5-8 at some pace (I don’t know what he said I’m tuning him out by this point) and I had some miles where I hit in the 5s.  I’m the greatest runner known to mankind.
            Me:  Wow, that’s truly amazing (a little sarcastic, but truly not caring, just wishing I had my quiet bathroom back).
Jim:  Man, I’m fast.  I just can’t believe I’m so fast.  I’m pretty sure the sidewalk might be on fire out there I ran so fast.
            Me:  Hmmmm…yeah, probably so.
Jim:  So (lazy wife) did you work out this morning?
            Me:  No, no I didn’t.  I have Masters Swim tonight.  I have a triathlon on Sunday so I’m already running 5 days this week so I had planned to take this morning off from running.  Is that ok with you?  Or did I need to clear my morning off with you?
Jim:  Woah….is it that intimidating to live with such a superior athlete?
Me:  You’re an idiot.  When are you going out of town?
Jim:  I’m not.
Me:  What?  I thought you said you were out of town almost all week?  You need to find somewhere to go! 
Jim:  Man I can really feel the love.  You are going to get discussed on my blog today!
Me:  Oh no, not that, anything but that! (note more sarcasm here)

Jim and I do truly love each other, but clearly one of us is not a morning person.  I can drag myself out of bed every day at 4:30 am to run, but it’s usually not pretty.  Once I’m done I just need some space….Jim’s morning enthusiasm is usually not too well received in the Weatherly household.  So sue me J


  1. HA! I'm often amazed at how different the two sides of the story are in my own marriage. We totally see things through completely different lenses.

  2. This fair, I cant take sides, I like you both. There is actually 3 sides to the story, his side, her side and real side. I think the real conversation finished with

    "You know what, we are both faster the BDD."

    "Good point"

    Thats how I see it

  3. I saw his post yesterday and refrained from commenting until you got your version up. :^)

    You are just like Dan and me, except in my house I am the morning person and he's...not. When I first met him, I thought he was mad at me every took a while before I realized that it's not that he doesn't want to talk to ME, he doesn't want to talk PERIOD.

    Now that we have kids, I have my daughter to talk to. She's just like me in the morning...chatty, bubbly. We drive him crazy together! :^) (I think our son is going to be like him...)

    Anyway, LOL!

  4. ha ha so glad to hear your side. :) I knew there had to be 2 sides to the story.

    Good luck at your tri this weekend!

  5. ha-ha! I love it!

    Thanks for sharing the TRUE side of the story, you know, because the woman is always right. ;-)

  6. are clearly right (sorry jim!) i live this reality in my own household...husband who is naturally just GREAT at everything and loves to talk about his GREATNESS and for everyone to validate his GREATNESS! oh, and he never respects my need to be left the hell alone in the morning either. great post, you guys crack me up!

  7. You guys crack me up! You should borrow Thing 2 in the guys can just growl at each other ;)

    Good luck with your Tri!

  8. Oh too funny! I hate it when my husband tries to talk to me first thing in the morning, then is mad when I don't want to talk. How many times have we gone over this?

  9. I LOVE this post! My husband is AWAKE from the second his eyes open. I however need about an hour before I want to interact with other humans. I love him dearly but if it's early in the morning, I sometimes want to punch him! :P hehe

  10. Lol, hilarious! Reading it from both perspectives is even better! You guys always crack me up, haha

  11. Ahhh that sounds very different...I agree with BDD I think...the real story is a little different I think.

  12. Love you guys and I'm thinking that Jim and I need to be roommates for a week and that you and Karen need to be roommates for that week as well.

    These conversations are all to similar.

    You and Karen would not say a word in the morning and Jim and I would be like the talking heads on a news broadcast trying to be louder than the other about how great we are.

  13. You two are hilarious :)

    I haven't been sleeping well myself. Last "night" I didnt fall asleep til 5:30am (this morning). I got up for work at 6:30am... Josh then tells me around lunch time how tired HE is... I could have strangled him!

  14. Um this is probably the greatest thing i have ever read. I just read it to my boyfriend and we were both dying! Thanks for sharing. Simply amazing.

  15. this is hilarious...the morning thing....that is part of all marriages I think...I am the Jim...AND my husband does NOT run..can you imagine how much I get on his nerves?!!!

  16. Ha, this is so familiar! We would definitely have this kind of argument over how a conversation really went!

  17. Ha ha...this post totally cracked me up! The conversation(s) were hilarious! :)

  18. All of you who left comments should know Michael tells "tall tales" at times. She claims she invented cheese, led the Yankees in home runs last year, and walked on a tight rope across the Grand Canyon once ... and I KNOW she's never even been to Canada!

    ... take side if you will, but I never, never, never, neeeeeeever forget!!!

  19. Very funny. As not a morning person myself I get it!

  20. OMG. You two are so funny. I love it. :o)

  21. LMAO! My husband rolls out of bed at 5:00 am on the weekends without an alarm. I drag myself out sometime after 7, usually after hitting snooze a few times. He can't seem to understand why I don't want him to talk to me when I first come downstairs. ;o)

  22. Ha ha ha. I read Jim's yesterday and it's nice to get the other perspective. You both crack me up.

  23. Sooo funny! You guys are so funny. My hubby doesn't run and I think his eyes roll back in his head when I ramble on.

  24. I love it. :)

    Now, I need my husband to start blogging, because that is just plain funny.

  25. You two are hilarious! Rachelle told me to check out your blogs and I am so glad she did :)

  26. There are always two sides to every story and the truth exist somewhere in between!!!!