I’m laying it all out here. I’m frustrated to say the least.
I’m going to try not to complain….a lot. I have accomplished some amazing things this year – my first marathon in January, my first Half Ironman in July, and a 5K and half marathon PR. These are not things that come easily. I know this.
But here’s where my pain point is. I don’t know if I will ever know my true potential as an athlete and that’s frustrating. In April I set my half marathon PR with a 10:58 per mile pace. At that time I was easily running my shorter runs in the low 10s and could even eek out a 9 something pace during my speed sessions. I knew, just knew that with continued training I would get my times down even farther and finally inch my way from bottom of the pack to middle of the pack…maybe, just maybe.
But here we are in October and I’m running my slowest times all year. Yesterday I did a 4 mile run and averaged a 13:10 pace. I wasn’t pushing it, and I have a cold, but still it’s tough to see that kind of pace on the Garmin. I have a half marathon Sunday, one I have been looking forward to. It is a super FLAT course, a great one to set a PR on. This is the race my husband Jim has been training for all year (the full marathon of course), and while I can’t say I’ve been training specifically for this race, my plan was to start training pretty intently for it in late July. I totally expected to be able to set a new PR at this race, and now I’ll be lucky to do it in under 2:35.
OBSTACLES have kept me from doing much over the past few months. I am literally a walking injury. If I’m not injured I’m sick. Jim told me that if he didn’t live with me, and see that all my issues are legit he would totally think I was a hypochondriac. I know I have become the “What’s wrong with Michael now” girl, and that’s just downright embarrassing.
So what’s the problem?? It’s multiple things. As many of you know I injured my back several years ago and this really is the central issue for me. I do not have strong core and I know this. I know that to do what I want to do I need a strong core. But, I had been so focused on endurance for my marathon and half ironman I hadn’t had much time to focus on strength. Therefore, my plan post-half ironman was to focus on BETTER, FASTER, STRONGER….that was my new motto! But then, out of nowhere I develop Veritgo….that last for weeks, I can barely walk, much less train. I finally get through that and I sign up for personal training sessions and get ready for improvement. Only one issue, within 2 weeks I had completely wrecked my back. One day after a long run I was reaching across the bathroom tub and threw my back out. I was in bed for 4 days! I spent the next 10 days recovering – stretching, ART therapy, etc. I finally recovered, but have continued to just have a list of minor nagging issues, and 2 colds in the past two months on top of everything else.
So it’s not surprising that I am where I am today. Not really surprising at all, just frustrating. I am ready to push myself to the next level. I have the dedication and mental focus to move forward, but sometimes my body will not let me. Every time I push, it pushes back.
But here I am again. I am signed up for a core/leg strengthening class for cyclists (I’m sure it’s good for runners too). I’m hopeful it will give me what I need, but I am worried that I will injure myself yet again. I know to be careful, and I am…but sometimes it still just happens. So there it is, all my woes. If anyone has thoughts or suggestions I would LOVE to hear them.
I went through the same frustrations as you as far as my running. I felt that no matter how much I ran, I was not getting faster, until this year. This year I spent the first 2 months focusing on speed work and interval training (I even did this on a treadmill, it just worked for me) and then once it got nicer weather, I quit using my Garmin. Nothing is more frustrating to be running, feeling fast and looking down and seeing a 9:45 pace, or a 7:30 pace and scared of holding that. Once I let go of my Garmin and just ran by feel, I ran faster than I did with it! It worked for me!
ReplyDeleteI think you are amazing.
ReplyDeleteWe all go through the hills and valleys of training. It's never fun. You are so awesome. I don't comment much on any blog anymore but I DO read them. I have loved following your journey and the goals you've set for yourself. I am happy you signed up for the core/leg strengthening class. THAT WILL HELP!! A strong core ALWAYS helps!!
You've got this.
I hate that you are feeling this way, and that your body is betraying you this way.
ReplyDeleteI will say, the one thing I did differently this year is a once a week, 1 hour strength class. It varied in routine and focus, but it was always 1 hour, always full body...upper, lower and core were always spent by the end. No speed training. No intervals. Some tempo work, but mostly just running and the 1 hour class.
Strength will help you. There are modifications to every move. I hope it helps you as much as it helped me...
{{{{hugs}}}} I think the core class will be great for you. Your journey is always inspiring to me, don't give up on your body, things will get better.
ReplyDeleteMy year's been a bit the same - injury and illness and really no way to string decent training together. And I too have a half on Sunday. It's incredibly frustrating but you just have to go with the flow. Train when you can and build up your strength. And maybe next year will be a better year.
ReplyDeleteMy year's been a bit the same - injury and illness and really no way to string decent training together. And I too have a half on Sunday. It's incredibly frustrating but you just have to go with the flow. Train when you can and build up your strength. And maybe next year will be a better year.
ReplyDeleteOne day at a time. I think that's all you can do. I can understand your frustration. I think its probably helpful you have a husband that knows what you are going through in regards to training. One day at a time will get you through.
ReplyDeleteMan I don't blame you for being frustrated. You have accomplished GREAT things this year (as well as really helping others like me) and of course you want to build on them. I hope this newest endeavor at building your core helps you without any other injuries. Take care.
ReplyDeleteI don't have any real advice, but I do have a lot of sympathy. I've been fighting injury after injury for the last two years. Every time I think I've healed and am back on track, bam! So yeah, I hear you on the slower than ever feeling...
ReplyDeleteA very wise woman wrote on a post of mine once, "One step and one run at a time! You are working toward an amazing goal and you will get there!"
ReplyDelete;)
Feel ya, girlie!
I think spending the offseason working on strength and core will help reduce your injuries
ReplyDeleteI think you are amazing! I don't think the "fast" people realize just how hard it is to be a slower athlete. We work and work and work and yet our progress tends to be slow. But I think what us slower endurance athletes possess is the ability to mentally go the distance. We train longer, we race longer. That takes an entirely different skill set than just racing all out and knocking out a 1:30 1/2 marathon. Just keep trying and do what you can do....because that's all you can do most times! Plus, I feel like I have more fun being in the back of the pack than some of the really fast people. hehe :)
ReplyDeleteListen up friend, take your Garmin, leave it at home and just go run. I'm sooooo at that point right now too. I'm more sore than I was last year, I'm more injured than I was last year. My body hates me and I know you can identify cause your body hates you too. :) That's why we're besties (as my 13 year old would say). Last night I was asking myself how many years need to go by for me to reach "my best"? Next, how many years will have to go by until I realize that my best mentally will not be what my body can do physically. I've been dreading most of my runs until I just said "f*ck it". I will run because it is a happy place and if it takes me 9 minutes to get a mile or 12 minutes to get a mile then that's what that mile is gonna be. My MOST pain free marathon was 5:25. My most painful was 4:36. An utter cripple I was FOR A WEEK. Makes no sense. Find your happy place and roll with it. We love you for whatever pace you run at!
ReplyDeleteBe patient and follow a plan! Sounds like you're headed in the right direction, strengthen as much as you can and keep logging the distance. I was feeling this way at the beginning of the summer and it has taken 6 months to start to feel like I'm getting where I want to be. So don't give up!!! Be consistent and keep putting one foot in front of the other!
ReplyDelete{{{{hugs}}}} Oh Michael... I'm *so* sorry that you are dealing with all of this! So sorry! Boy can I empathize with you, for sure! I don't have any great words of wisdom, but I just wanted you to know that I am praying for you and cheering for you. Some of us just have more obstacles than others, it seems. : ) Keep with it, my friend!
ReplyDeleteSorry that you haven't had the best year. First off that is a bummer that you have had injury problems. Your back problem sounds like the main cause of everything. I have no idea how to fix it, but injuring something like your back can affect everything, since it is linked to everything.
ReplyDeleteI've had problems with my left knee (runners knee) and right foot (stress fracture) and sometimes now I still feel some discomfort. I'm not sure when the discomfort will ever go away completely.
So basically, I wouldn't worry about what pace you are running or racing or things like that. I would mainly try to get your body fully healthy and the pace will take care of itself. Because I miss the days of simply being able to exercise without worrying at all about what injuries I have or thinking about what hurts - and I wonder if I will ever be worry free again in regards to injuries.
Hang in there! I have had some of the same feelings as my pace has gradually crept down to the low 10's, my friends are speeding by me in the low 9's! I think consistency, having a good training plan and strength training have helped me a lot!
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